Lama Ole’s answer:
Modern psychology has many ideas on the subject, but for me it is much simpler: you help as long as it is practical and as long as people don’t become opportunistic. Help them as long as there is a natural exchange. If they become dependent or don’t achieve anything themselves, you can happily sit out a round and say, “I’ve given you my idea, and if you don’t like it then go somewhere else.”
For example, if I were to give good lectures only when rich people who might donate something were there, and bad lectures when just a few old hippies were listening, then I would be neither a good teacher nor an honest man. I have to give everything I can in every situation. Then, if something doesn’t come across the right way, it is the karma of the people.
I don’t think it’s a good idea to measure out one’s love. I would rather give it all: in love, full throttle and hug whoever gets close—and if someone keeps his distance that’s also OK. But go through with all the strength you have and give what you can. That’s my formula. If people can receive everything, then they get one hundred percent, and if they only have the karma for five percent, then that doesn’t mean we give any less.